A recent Virginia case in which an teenager with Asperger’s was sentenced by jury to ten-and-a-half years in prison for assaulting a police officer is a horrible tragedy for all concerned.
News accounts reported that the teen went to the library, but finding it closed, sat down outside on the grass.
It was pointed out that the teen happens to be black and nearby school children became afraid
and complained to the school crossing guard, saying that he might have a gun. Police were then summoned.
A single officer approached the teen, checked him for a gun and found no weapon. He then asked his name several times with no response. Because the teen wouldn’t tell the officer his name, he grabbed the youth by the arm and threw him over the top of his car in order to cuff him while declaring him under arrest. A struggle ensued and the teen
caused injuries to the officer.
This is a terribly disturbing case on many levels. The officer is himself the father of mentally
challenged thirty-three year old and on that basis, was said to be highly sensitive of
those with developmental disabilities. However, an officer experienced with autism would not expect
their subjects to answer all questions asked or find the need to suddenly grab and arrest
them. Why was there no call for back-up?
So basically, a young man with autism was sitting outside a library waiting for it to open and then a short while later,
an officer is injured from a struggle and now a young man faces over a decade behind bars.
This is the latest in a series of avoidable tragedies, including the wrongful deaths of two young adults with autism in Los Angeles. All
of the cases share the fact that the suspects were committing no crimes, but failed to respond properly to police commands. The
concerning element is without proper training and awareness, the number of these cases
are going to expand exponentially as more and more children with autism grow into young adults.
Because the teen had another incident on his record, the prosecutor maintained that he was wasn’t impaired by autism, but rather is an innately aggressive and dangerous person.
The fact that the jury bought this parsing of conditions is not good news for anyone.
In a previous article, I advocated for a voluntary autism
registry, but that is a distant goal that requires a great deal of work and effort, even after communities agree that it’s needed. I am now thinking that teens and young adults with autism should carry visible medical alert
indicators such as a bracelet or necklace to notify officers of their condition and provide an emergency cell phone number
of a caregiver.
Of course, the need for more officer training in autism is only amplified by
these heartbreaking turn of events.
One of the premier organizations that offers autism training for officers is run
by Dennis Debbaudt. Dennis is an ex-law enforcement official, father of a son
with autism and the founder of Autism Risk and Safety Management. We interviewed
him a few years ago and he provided some great insight into this emerging
problem and what is being done to address it.
While his organization is doing a tremendous job, much more effort is needed by others to
address this growing problem so these types of incidents are minimized or
completely eliminated in the future.
Parents of children with autism are always seeking ways to enhance the quality of
life for their children and massage therapy is becoming an increasingly popular
way of doing so.
One would think that a child with autism, who is commonly averse to touch, would find massage therapy intolerable. However, a massage therapist who works with children
are usually skilled at introducing touch and slowly building tolerance for it. Massage therapists know that it’s the light touch that is so aversive to these
children and they actual tolerate deep massages quite well.
The health benefits of massages are well-documented to the point where they are covered by many insurance companies and prescribed as supplemental therapy by some medical doctors.
Biochemically, body massages release serotonin, a neurotransmitting chemical known for giving a sense of well-being and
happiness. Conversely, abnormal serotonin synthesis is said to be linked to autism.
The Touch Research Institute of Miami has conducted several studies on the effect of massage therapy for children on the autism
spectrum and their results confirm what is anecdotally acknowledged – massage therapy can be of great benefit to children on the spectrum.
In one particularly interesting study, twenty children with autism ranging in age from 3 to 6 years were randomly assigned to massage therapy and reading attention control groups. Parents in the massage therapy group were trained by a massage therapist to massage their children for 15 minutes prior to bedtime every night for one month, while the parents of the attention control group read Dr. Seuss stories to their children on the same time schedule. Results showed that
the children in the massage group stayed on task better at school and showed more social relatedness during playtime observations.
Parents also reported that their children were more responsive to verbal cues, had an easier time with daily tasks, slept
better and were generally calmer.
Most poignantly, these children were more receptive to their parent’s touch and even initiated affection themselves. Scientists used to believe children with autism couldn’t bond with their parents.
This theory has since been discarded and children with autism do indeed bond with
parents, but sometimes just cannot show it. It is very encouraging to know that massages
create a new avenue of expression and help bridge the worlds between a parent and child.
As always in examining alternative choices, consider them as ways to augment and enhance established medical protocols, not replace them.
When my son with autism was finally released from the hospital after battling Crohn’s, massage therapy was instrumental in him regaining his health and vitality. Doctors were amazed at his progress at his first follow-up visit, proclaiming that he “looked and felt like a different
person." I credit massage therapy with providing a boost of energy to his recovery. His cheeks were rosy, his eyes bright and his spirit was calm.
Best of all, there was no risk and no gimmicks — just the ancient art of human touch.
Sal Khan was a hedge fund manager tutoring his cousins through
distance learning. He started making them instructional videos to reinforce their learning when he couldn’t be there in
person and after a few lessons, his cousins told him that they liked him better on video. After absorbing
the shocking statement, he realized it was a back-handed compliment.
Through the use of video, his cousins could repeat what they didn’t understand without suffering embarrassment, while still having the benefit of their uncle’s warm, approachable demeanor. He started making them videos for a myriad of subjects and envisioned an entire public academy of free lessons delivered via YouTube.
That dream is now a reality in the form of the Khan Academy, which boasts 2,100 instructional videos on a range of
topics, as well as ongoing assessments and test preparation courses. There’s no
sign-up and no
login requirements — users simply go to the Web site and start learning ( http://www.khanacademy.org
Children with autism naturally gravitate towards computers and online learning where the social and sensory issues of a classroom are eliminated.
As a result, the Khan Academy is a great resource for parents of these children
to be aware of. Although much of the information is advanced, basic arithmetic is offered and affords a perfect way to augment math learning for young children with autism. Older children with autism can find many topics to reinforce classwork, or explore their special interests.
As a mother of a high school freshman with autism, I have been forced to home
schooling because his high school placement failed, so I am thrilled to discover
the Khan Academy. The timing of
the discovery couldn’t be more fortuitous as I was worried about the expenses
associated with gathering all of the appropriate curriculum for him.
The Khan Academy even attracted the attention of Bill Gates, who sees it as the wave of the future
for education. His foundation is supporting Sal Khan in his quest and is actively seeking ways of bringing his model of learning directly into the classroom.
Since time immemorial, man has been connected to the earth. Working in fields or gardening, walking barefoot on
beaches, or sleeping under the stars are all activities that link us to the natural, electrical energy of the earth’s surface. But modern man, in his concrete world filled with monitors and machines, has become more estranged from these elemental forces.
Earthing (aka grounding) is a term that refers to the conscious choice to re-establish that lost connection. People who subscribe to earthing report better sleep, less stress,
reduced chronic pain and faster recovery from trauma. Earthing has been reported to
equalize the body to the same energy level as the earth’s, resulting in the
synchronization of our biological clocks, hormonal cycles and physiological rhythms. Hence, the body is
suffused with healing through negatively charged electrons present on the earth’s surface.
Earthing as a scientific and medical movement began in the late 1990s when a retired cable TV executive named Clint Ober started to think about the human body in terms of electrical
grounding. Mr. Ober drew parallels between the workings of cable TV and the
human body’s electrical system. He realized that most people wear synthetically-soled shoes that insulate their bodies from the
earth’s energy field, which stabilizes not only cable TV, but all electrical
equipment throughout the world. This realization has lead people to
recognize scientifically what man has always known intuitively: direct contact with the earth is beneficial to one’s health.
In fact, two separate studies on earthing/grounding were conducted in 2004
and 2010 and published in The Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine.
In the latter study, twenty-eight men and women took part and were subjected to a grounding
device while sitting in a standard reclining chair for two hours.
Readings were taken during all phases of "treatment" and surprisingly,
they indicated changes in blood oxygenation, pulse rate, perfusion index and respiratory rate.
As a result, the following was concluded by Dr. Gaetan Chevalier, who oversaw the study:
"These results warrant further research to determine how grounding affects
the body. Grounding could become important for relaxation, health maintenance
and disease prevention."
Grounding as a potential treatment for autism came to my attention through my son’s physician, Dr. John Green of Oregon City.
Dr. Green only works with children with autism and also specializes in environmental health and immunology. His response
was, "I think earthing will prove helpful with sleep quality in some of the sleep disturbed
children and may in the longer term help with oxidative stress, which is such a huge factor in most kids on the
As alternative treatments go, grounding appears to be safe, natural and very
intriguing. Earthing "blankets" can be purchased at a relatively inexpensive
price and while no one method should serve as a substitute for traditional
autism therapies, it’s certainly worth investigating to examine its potential
We would encourage anyone who has tried (or will try) grounding to report back
on their experiences.
study was conducted by Brian Freedman of the Center for Autism and Related Disorders
(CARD) at the Kennedy Krieger Institute, dispelling the popular notion that the
divorce rate among autism families was near 80%. The study found that despite
high stress among families facing autism, 64 percent of children with an autism spectrum disorder
had two married biological or adoptive parents, while 65 percent of children who do not have an autism spectrum disorder had two parents.
The findings seemed to contradict previous theories about divorce and autism,
offering little comfort to those within the autism community who have been
impacted by divorce. For these families (including mine), their rate is 100%.
Divorce involving families of children with autism leaves millions of children
in situations that will be detrimental and will certainly cause a child’s progress to be severely impacted.
So, what can be done?
The key is to focus on the big picture. A child’s best interest must be put first and personal battles have to be let go.
Years after arguments and disputes are over, a child’s growth will be obstructed because of the now-forgotten fight.
Putting a child and a relationship at the helm will keep ships sailing back into smooth waters following the rough seas.
A family’s goal after a divorce must be healing the child with autism. Anything and everything beyond that is secondary. Remember, these kids have impeccable memories and think in pictures. Mommy is mommy and daddy is
daddy and the images and painful memories of a divorce will remain for many
years to come.
I have personally chosen that I would rather be alone and respect my child’s relationship with his daddy then to ever try and substitute.
A child does not directly cause the break up and should never have the door
closed to both parents.
A marriage and family counselor of the courts once explained, "When you
break up and see each other again, it’s like sitting on the curb in front of
your house that has just burned down…you are so euphoric to be alive and in
each other’s arms knowing that there’s still a chance."
Many couples have tried reconciliation but cannot avoid breaking up again
because a house needs to be rebuilt and if you don’t correct the things that caused it to burn down in the first place, it will burn down again.
It is always wise to bring counseling in, but it is also important to remain cautious.
Counseling for parents of children with autism has to be extremely specific. Ideas like having
a child get used to two different homes or regularly changing his or her routines may seem like textbook fixes for the
parents and the courts, but can be disastrous for children with ASD. The many years of guidelines set down for children in the court systems are based solely upon
neurotypical children and not children with autism.
Our children’s best interests must become our own if they are going to have a
fighting chance. When a father’s interests are purely those of his son or
daughter, he too will want to come back and fight alongside with you.
The factors that contribute to a divorce in couples facing autism do not
necessarily include the diagnosis itself. It can be related to many other
things, including the lack of resources and support in the schools and community, the sense of worthlessness at helping
a child, the severity of the ASD (which increases without resources) and knowing that there’s more that can be done, but not knowing what that is.
If at all possible, dads need to return home. Their children need them more than
ever. A child’s progress and potential cannot be fully realized unless both
parents are tag-teaming TOGETHER in the battle. Single mothers most likely have sacrificed
everything they have and a father coming home will be like the cavalry showing up in the 23rd hour.
If a spouse never returns, they will be missing out on the many miracles that
occur on a daily basis involving children with autism.
Reconciliation may be a tall order, but children with autism need both their
mommies and daddies and sometimes we must be willing to live for something
greater than ourselves to ensure the best possible outcome.
Last year, Holly Robinson Peete appeared on the hit reality show, Celebrity
Apprentice, where she competed against 13 other contestants in hopes of
benefiting the charity founded by her and her husband. Peete eventually placed
second in the competition, losing to
Poison front man and "Rock of Love" star Bret Michaels.
As part of
their season finale challenge, Peete and Michaels were both assigned to create a new drink flavor
for Snapple, along with a corresponding ad campaign. Michaels, who has diabetes,
came up with the Trop-A-Rocka flavor, while Peete, who has a son with
autism, created Compassionberry Tea. Peete’s drink benefited
the HollyRod Foundation, a non-profit organization that assists those with autism and Parkinson’s
disease, while Michaels’ flavor supported the American Diabetes Association.
Public response to both drinks after the finale was overwhelmingly positive.
However, in a not-so-compassionate move, Snapple has apparently pulled the plug on
Peete’s drink, just one month before Autism Awareness Month.
Earlier last week, she tweeted the following:
"Disappointed 2 hear that @snapple is discontinuing my #compassionberry tea flavor which is not only yummy but spreading #autism awareness…"
were no further details as to why Snapple decided to discontinue Peete’s
Compassionberry flavor, however, in a subsequent tweet, she noted that despite
the move, Snapple
was still continuing to carry the competing tea created by Michaels:
"@Snapple is only discontinuing my #compassionberry supporting #autism happy they r keeping Bret’s tea 4 #diabetes but room 4 both"
Presumably, this was strictly a business decision by Snapple based on sales and/or demand.
However, nixing the drink so close to Autism Awareness Month, while at
the same time keeping Michaels’ flavor, is the kind of move that would be worthy of a hot-seat in Trump’s board room.
Admittedly, I have not tried the drink, however, there have been many who
have commented on its great taste. Compassionberry ingredients include passion
fruit and strawberries, along with traditional tea flavors.
For those who would like to see the Compassionberry Tea make a comeback, a note
can be sent to Snapple’s consumer affairs division here.
Those of you who’ve read my previous articles already know that I was on a quest to make my son’s high school a safe, viable place for him to be. He has Asperger’s, an anxiety
disorder and Crohn’s, so he is facing multiple challenges simultaneously.
Last month, I
posted an article about “Intricate Minds," a video designed to help teachers and classmates appreciate what it’s like to have Asperger’s. I thought
the video would be good for those who my son encounters at school to have a heads-up about his condition.
The thinking was this might cut down on the snickering when he’s having a bad
day or even help modify a teacher’s approach to him. Having shared this video with my son’s principal, she thanked me and said she’d look into it. I’ve heard nothing
My son’s special education teacher is untrained in Asperger’s and has a habit of engaging in verbal
confrontations with him. There used to be a long running skit on Saturday Night Live about a guy who goes to a restaurant, orders a fruit
cocktail and an anvil comes down on the table, yet time and time again he still orders the fruit cocktail. The way my son’s teacher communicates with him is definitely a fruit
Recently, my son became upset by having to do a math worksheet he had already done. Instead of shifting his attention or guiding him to a self-calming activity,
this teacher took him out into the hall to talk about it, which only flooded him with more
anxiety. Pained by the gaping strangers, he totally lost it, whereupon she chastised him for being rude to
his teacher. She then called to inform me that he has had yet another “behavioral
Thinking the CAT-kit might help her find a way to access my son’s emotions without inflaming him, I sent her a link about it.
Once again, no response.
Increasingly exasperated, I recommended that she read up on Dr. Tony Attwood and avail herself of my considerable expertise because the school was not accommodating my son and he was being set up to fail.
An IEP meeting that was set for six weeks ago out suddenly got moved up by five-and-a-half weeks. That meeting was
this past Tuesday and I can only describe it as an invitation to my own beheading. They invoked my son as being a behavior problem, since
this absolves them of all responsibility. I countered that he’s fine when he’s in the appropriate
environment but the principal told me that my son needs to develop coping skills to deal with his environment as it is. I’ve been in this
scenario one-too-many times, even being forced to take the district to court over their desire to put my son in a behavior program that would only turn him into a behavioral problem. I ultimately prevailed, but it took years of turmoil and instability.
I can’t count the number of IEP meetings I’ve been to for both my sons. They range from being gratifyingly productive to an
absolute horror show. This past meeting fell in the latter category. I ended up abruptly walking
out and now I’m poised to sign yet another “Intent to Homeschool” form.
It’s very disheartening that with all of the autism awareness out there, a school system
can be so backwards. Improving special education would take money but they are millions of dollars in the hole.
However, simple steps such as requiring special education teachers to attend educational conferences
on autism would not cost that much financially.
Undoubtedly, my story is not unique and these struggles are being played out
across the country. Despite a lot of progress in the area of autism acceptance
and awareness, my personal experiences are demonstrating that we still have a
long way to go, particularly in our school systems.
Much attention has been given to the accomplishments of individuals on the high-functioning end of the autism spectrum.
We hear of gifted savants such as Daniel Tammet or Kim Peek who defy imagination
with uncanny visual, mathematical or historical recollections and abilities.
However, in a category all his own is Tito Mukhopadhyay, a native of India who has been described as “the Rosetta
stone of autism." Despite being non-verbal and in need of constant care, Tito is able to describe and illustrate thoughts about the world he lives in with incredible detail and insightfulness.
Normal brain functioning is described as the combination of numerous processes and systems seamlessly working together. While neurotypical
individuals process sights and sounds immediately, current research indicates that this information is processed at different speeds in our brains, but so rapidly that they seem simultaneous to us.
Mukhopadhyay has described his world as a kaleidoscopic, where he is forced to select a single sense at a time in order to keep
a flood of visual and auditory senses at bay. These descriptions confirm recent theories
about autism and are helping scientists grasp the inner workings of the autistic brain.
Tito’s ability to share his amazing insight is in part due to the tenacious efforts of his mother,
Soma, who was undaunted by his heartbreaking diagnosis at the age of three and insisted upon teaching him to read and write. Untrained in autism, she dedicated herself to reaching her
son and single-handedly developed the Rapid Prompting Method for Autism, a
communication technique that she is generously sharing with others ( http://www.halo-soma.org
Simply put, she trained her son to focus, point and spell using an omnipresent writing
pad and later on through a keyboard. Tito has now evolved into a prolific and gifted author and poet, shocking the world with beautiful stories and poems he began writing between the ages of eight and eleven.
Now in his early twenties, Tito Mukhopadhyay has already written a book entitled “How Can I Talk If My Lips Don’t Move? Inside My Autistic Mind,” an unparalleled look into the heart and mind of a tortured, yet joyous soul. In it, Tito describes how his mind works and the ways he views the world and its neurotypical inhabitants. He also shares his unique perception of speaking stories to a mirror and then having the mirror speak the stories back to him as if it was an entity separate from himself and non simultaneous with his own speech.
Tito once wrote, “With the help of my imagination, I can go to places that do not exist and they are like beautiful
dreams. But it is a world full of improbability racing toward uncertainty.”
The improbable accomplishments of this remarkable young man bring hope to the uncertainty of living with
low-functioning autism. Everyone on the autism spectrum and their loved ones can take heart from this
soulful and accomplished young man.
We recently received a comment by someone who noticed the excessive coverage of
American Idol’s James
Durbin on our site. My response was that we have not covered him nearly enough.
James Durbin is currently shattering many misconceptions and stereotypes about what
special needs are capable of and is raising a tremendous
amount of awareness for both Asperger’s and Tourette’s. The positive feedback we have received about Durbin has been nothing short of
remarkable and he has been responsible for giving hope to many affected by autism and other related disorders. As a result, I feel it’s necessary to
continue reporting on James as much as possible so people will continue to learn
about his story and discover just how far he’s come to get where he is.
A few days ago at an American Idol Top 13 party in Los Angeles, James was
interviewed by HollywodLife.com and opened up about his family, personal
life and even addressed the many comparisons being made to Season 8 American Idol
runner-up, Adam Lambert. The interview, which can be seen below, is fascinating for several reasons.
First of all, it is one of the first times we have seen James in an
unscripted, unedited environment. His facial tics are overwhelmingly
noticeable and while watching the interview, I couldn’t help to think about the horrible
teasing he must have endured while growing up. In fact, a reader posted the following to our site yesterday:
I am from Santa Cruz, California. I know several people who know James, or who have kids who went to school with James. As the story goes, James was bullied horribly for his afflictions. I am not sure if he is on medication or what his deal is. But I know that the tourettes
(sic) and Aspergers (sic) (which was not even named until 1994) were very visable
(sic) in James while he was in school. I have heard stories from too many people.
I wish James well.
And despite his talent and accomplishments, James has received some harsh
criticism online, mostly because people think he’s not "autistic
enough" and others who are die-hard Adam Lambert fans who claim that he’s
only a knock-off version, with a narrower vocal range.
In his interview, Durbin addresses these comparisons and also mentions that he
had auditioned for American Idol several years ago and did not make the cut.
With all of the obstacles and challenges James has overcome over the years, his
accomplishments so far have been truly inspiring. Additionally, judging from the
interview, James appears to be a very genuine and grounded individual and it’s
highly likely that as he continues to advance in the competition, his fan base
will only continue to grow, increasing his chances to become the next American
A few weeks ago, many in the autism community observed "Autism
Sunday," also known as the International Day of Prayer for Autism and Asperger Syndrome.
The annual event, which takes place during the second week of February,
encourages people from all denominations across the globe to pray for those
affected by autism spectrum disorders. The response to this year’s event was
extremely heartening, knowing that so many other people were committed to
praying about something that is responsible for affecting over 67 million people.
As a person of devout faith, one of the most difficult things I’ve had to
deal with during my Christian walk was learning of my son’s autism. When he was
first diagnosed at the age of three, some of the many questions I posed to
myself included why me?, am I being punished? and how could this have happened?
Since that time and after many highs and lows, I’ve not only been given the answers, but I’ve also been able to encourage others who posed these difficult
Let me begin by saying that I believe God is omniscient, omnipresent, omnipotent and the Creator
of all things. He does not make mistakes, never needs a plan B and will never be
caught off-guard. As such, I am comforted in knowing that my son’s autism did
not happen by accident nor did it take God by surprise.
When we first received his diagnosis, I remember initially feeling angry at God and my faith was tested in
a major way. After all, it took me over two years to get pregnant and I felt as if my child was a direct answer to prayer.
The questioning and doubting that ensued is something that most parents struggle
with at some point in time during their autism journeys. For those who do not
share the same beliefs as me, the questions may come in different forms, but I think at some point, we all ask why we’ve been dealt such a difficult lot in
I did not choose autism — it chose me. It came and kicked in our door as an unwelcome
guest. With that in mind, I know that God has entrusted me with my child’s autism, knowing it was something I and my family could bear. Not only has this been proven
correct, but we have been able to witness and experience many miracles, joys and
triumphs in the past six years. Our child is a gift and I would not change a hair
on his head. His uniqueness, talents and personality were all created the way
As a believer, perhaps the best answer to the question of "why me" can
be found in the ninth chapter of the book of John.
When encountering a man who was blind from birth, Jesus’ disciples asked him,
“Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” Jesus
said, “Neither this man nor his parents sinned, but this happened so that the
works of God might be displayed in him."
Whenever my family faces challenges associated with my son’s condition, we are
encouraged by knowing that despite our struggles, he is being used by God
to impact other people’s lives and glorify Him in the process.
Additionally, my son’s condition is not a "curse," nor is it an affliction, but rather a gift that is being used to enrich and bless those around him, beginning with me.
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Once again, our nation has been rocked by another young adult conducting a murderous rampage that ends multiple lives, including his own. My heart sank when the shooter in the latest tragedy, Elliot Roger, was identified as having Asperger’s Syndrome (AS). Barely past Sandy Hook with Adam Lanza, and now this. Even with some news […]