Making Authentic Friendships (MAF): A New Autism Social Network
In the midst of this pandemic, it’s nigh unto impossible to address the isolation of individuals on the autism spectrum who were already socially estranged before the virus hit. My young adult ASD son invariably turns to social media, which never goes well. The rough and tumble world of Twitter has left him devastated on multiple occasions. He lives by likes and dies by being blocked. Online “friends” often gang up and lash out at one another, insults are hurled and meltdowns in our house are frequent.
A while back, he finally swore off Twitter and closed his account. But as the pandemic wore on, he obsessed about restarting it. The other day while I was at the grocery store, he did, and the lid to pandora’s box was opened again. It did not go well. In exhorting him to sign off once again forever, I reminded him of the adage, “You can’t stop something old, but you can start something new.”
In that spirit, I recommended he try a new social networking platform a friend had messaged me about just the night before. It’s called “Making Authentic Friendships” (MFA) and it was started by Juliana Fetherman, a 23 year old concerned about her younger brother, Michael, who is diagnosed with autism and ADHD, and has difficulty finding friends. Common wisdom is autistic people are socially aloof and uninterested in forming relationships, but those of us who have personal experience with autism know just how false that assumption is. Autistic individuals want to belong and experience intense loneliness and isolation when that seems so impossible.
To help her brother and others like him, Juliana created an interactive platform that enables individuals with special needs to make friends based on age, diagnosis, common interests and geographic location. Taking the title from her brother’s initials, MAF is currently serving the special needs community in 30 states, 12 countries and 5 continents. Intended for individuals ages 13 and older, it helps people find friends based on their geolocation, diagnosis, age and interests. The app is set up to work like a game with avatars, a cartoon style map and the ability to earn coins, appealing to a community frequently passionate about video games. While web-based, it also features an app version.
Because of the wide spectrum of individuals using the platform, sign-up is very easy and intuitive. Parents and caregivers will take heart in the attention to safety, which is MFA’s “number one priority.”
My son found it easy to join and enjoyed making an avatar of himself. He messaged someone his age who enjoys the same activities. Significantly, he didn’t go to pieces when he wasn’t messaged back immediately.
I’m sure I sound like a commercial for a product, but the online world can be dangerous for individuals with autism. Many times, people online have used “autistic” as a slur and it’s just about broken my son’s heart.
There’s a reason my son has always loved being around other people on the spectrum. He finds it freeing, saying that “it’s the only time that I’m not anxious about saying or doing something wrong.” I am relieved and grateful that there’s a new place in cyberspace intended specifically for people with special needs.